For many parents and caretakers of children, attempting to protect them from some of the harsh realities of our world is a very important issue. It has been debated and argued that the government is responsible for restricting what websites, television shows, movies, and video games should be able to project to viewers.
But where does the responsibility truly lie?
So many parents believe that what is on television should be regulated because their children are going to see things that they shouldn't. But should that restrict the rest of the people who are not parents of young children, or who aren't parents at all who want to watch explicit shows or purchase video games? In my opinion (and let me remind you, I am not a parent, but did grow up in a time where video games were and still are prevalent, and have acted as a nanny for children under the age of 10 for multiple years), I think that parents need to take a much more preventative approach to what their children are exposed to.
If and when I have children, I realize that it is no one's responsibility but mine to regulate what they are exposed to in my home. It is my responsibility to keep in close contact with the parents of my child's friends to ensure that my views and restrictions are known and respected. It is my responsibility to teach my child about sex early enough that he or she is not learning more from uneducated classmates or sexually explicit movies and television shows than they are from his or her own mother and father. I think that too often, sex is made out to be something that is "inappropriate" and "obscene." Children need to understand where they come from and need to hear about it from their parents first, so that they can ask any question and receive an honest answer in line with the beliefs that their parents decide to share with them. If sex is something that is respected and treated with a sense of dignity and responsibility, not only have you better educated your child and anyone that he or she chooses to share their opinion with, but you have also created a more respectful potential partner for someone later down the line.
If I don't want my child to be able to access inappropriate content, then I will not provide smart phones, a personal computer, or unrestricted television access. I refuse to have a child that is under the age of ten and spending most of his or her time locked in their room playing video games or surfing the internet. I will explain my choices to my child, the parents that my child interacts with, as well as the parents of my children's friends. If other parents cannot conform to the standards that I have set for raising my child, then my child will not be left in the care of another parent. Their child will be free to interact with my child in my home under my rules. My child will not have unrestricted access to Facebook or social media or the internet in general. I will use passwords, time restrictions, and the appropriate location of technological devices to ensure that my standards are met.
Although the amount of technology that children have access to is incredibly more vast than I could have imagined as a child, that also means that the amount of technology that parents have access to has also increased. If you do not want your child playing inappropriate games on a gaming console, do not purchase the games, and have open and honest conversations about your feelings with your child. I think that having a child who is afraid to tell you something is a failed relationship. Talk about sex before kids feel awkward discussing it with you. Talk about bullying, issues with race that they may encounter, drugs, choices that they will have to make, discussions other kids may have with them.
I respect the opinions of other parents to teach their children that they should not have sex before marriage, period. I, however, will teach my child that the topic of sex will absolutely be something that they face making a decision on before marriage, and that they should make informed, educated decisions about their actions. Knowing how to prevent unwanted pregnancy and diseases is the first step in educating children against these things. Kids are just that, kids. They get into situations that they are unprepared for, such as sex before marriage, and make ill-informed decisions because they don't know any better. Having realistic expectations for your child is incredibly important in my opinion.
Don't make your child scared to talk to you. Create open lines of communications without fear of punishment. If a child has a question about sex, make sure that he or she is comfortable enough to come to YOU about it, not someone else that is telling them God-only-knows what. If my child is intimidated or embarrassed to talk to me about something, then I have failed in creating open lines of communication and that is unacceptable to me. Despite how awkward a conversation may be, I would much rather accept the awkwardness than have my child being educated about something important by someone who may not share the same approach that I do.
I will teach my child to respect others no matter what their views. They are allowed to disagree, because having your own opinion is your right, but they must do so in a respectful way, and with the knowledge that not everyone was raised in the same way that they were. I will tell my child that just because someone is different from them, doesn't make either person better than the other. People were made differently so that we can learn about our differences with respect and not hatred. I don't care if someone is black, white, gay, straight, republican, democratic, catholic, baptist, or an anarchist; everyone is equal in my eyes and that will be what I preach to my children.
It is my responsibility as a parent to teach and nurture my child. Teachers are merely an added resource. It is not their job to teach my child about sex or manners, it is my responsibility as their parent. I have seen so many parents that have essentially failed at parenting. They have produced disrespectful, dishonest, rude, and immature children, and released them on the world without a care. Children who watch Family Guy and R rated movies under the age of 10. Children who curse at adults because they have never been reprimanded or taught otherwise. The blame lies with these parents. When you chose to reproduce, you need to realize the responsibilities that come with your decision and stop trying to push the responsibility onto others.
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