We've all heard the song. "Going to the chapel and we're gonna get married." But is it really true?
In this day and age, more people are opting for smaller, more intimate weddings. I myself know quite a few people who have forgone the church entirely in favor of a Justice of the Peace union. With the requirement of a marriage license/certificate (at least where I'm from), people are essentially seen as "married" by the state before they step foot before a priest or pastor or other religious figure.
Let's rewind a minute. I'll be the first to say that I'm a Christian, but I'm also a very big advocate for the separation of church and state. But when it comes down to it, there is a lot more than to the separation of church and state than meets the eye.
For example, the separation of church and state says that there will be no prayer in public schools, yet students are still expected to place their right hand over their heart and recite the Pledge of Allegiance? "One nation, under God." That right there violated religion in public schools. Going one step further, the money that we keep in our wallets still says, "In God we trust" on it.
For advocates of a separation between church and state, this is an incredibly difficult thing to tactfully divide. According to the 2012 Pew Study, 73% of Americans classified themselves as religious, meaning that more than 7 out of 10 people believe in some sort of religion. That's quite a few. I'll be the first one to admit that I mainly classify the separation of church and state as effecting the government's acceptance and recognition of same-sex unions. I often forget that with a true separation of church and state, I lose many of the things that I associate with simply every day life. The Pledge of Allegiance and the $5 bill in my wallet don't even begin to register when I debate with someone about recognition for same-sex couples.
But the fact is, you can't have your cake and eat it too. People who believe as Christians that we should have "Under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance as well as equality for same-sex couples must realize that it's one or the other. If we choose to remove religion from our government, we lose a part of our nation's founding as well. So where does the balance lie?
According to an article on www.gaylife.about.com, it is very hard to estimate exactly how many LGBT individuals are currently living in America today. The problem is presented in a variety of different ways including people who are not yet "out" and the different definitions that people have for what constitutes someone as LGBT. Experts estimate that the numbers are between 1 in 10 and 1 in 20. Let's just say 1 in 15 for the sake of this argument. But does that really matter? Many people see those statistics and think, it's obvious isn't it? Seven out of 10 and 1 out of 15...how are we still arguing over this? Well, in my mind, the reason is obvious. For Christians who advocate for the use of the word God in our government, taking away that word doesn't change the fact that they're religious, it simply changes the way our government adapts to the changing times of our world. But playing devil's advocate, deciding against same-sex unions doesn't change how two people feel about one another. So again I ask you, where is the balance?
In a "can't have your cake and eat it too" scenario, I chose the underdogs. I chose the rights of same-sex couples over saying God in the Pledge of Allegiance or on our currency. Why? Maybe you noticed that I haven't said same-sex marriage. I don't think that same-sex marriage should be ruled legal. Now wait a minute, you're asking yourselves how that makes sense given everything my blog has discussed so far. Don't worry, I'll explain. I think that if the government is going to separate church and state, then no one should have to get a "marriage license" or a marriage-anything. I think that the government should revert to judging unions between two people exactly the same: as a union. If people want to sanctify that union in front of a religious official and their God, that is their business. Make everything a union instead of a marriage. Take the word marriage out of the equation.
I realize that I have just done more to drive a wedge between people who read my blog and who now probably consider me a complete lunatic in terms of my Christianity. That's okay, because I believe in God and I believe what is said in Mark 12:30-31 (American King James version) And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength: this is the first commandment. And the second is like, namely this, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is none other commandment greater than these." I do love the lord my God, and I do love my neighbor as myself. It's just that my neighbor happens to be gay. Big freaking deal. I'm a Christian and I believe in the separation of church and state and the right of people in same-sex relationships to solidify their love together just like I hope to do with someone in my future. Simply because I was born as a woman who loves a man doesn't make me any better, or give me any greater rights than someone who was born as a man and who loves a man, or born as a woman who loves a woman.
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
The greatest of these is love. Love is something that each of us is capable of giving to another person, and it is such an incredible power. The Bible says love. Just love. Not love between people of opposite sexes, not people who are Catholic, or Episcopalian, or Buddhist. Just love.
So my bottom line is this. Forget the percentages. Forget the one in ten, seven in ten, one in a billion, it doesn't matter. What matters is the love of two people and the relationship that they choose to have. If you are lucky enough to have found solace in the love of another, hold onto it for dear life. Cherish it. Nurture it. True love is rare and precious. Don't let the opinions of small-minded people influence what the bible says is the "greatest." Love.
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