Do You See In Black & White? An Honest Talk About Race

Let's be real. I'm about as white as you can get. Fair skin, very few dance moves, and a lack of any jumping abilities. I'm like pristine snow; fluffy and white. My realistic jokes regarding my lack of exposure to diversity growing up always draw laughs when I'm around my friends, especially my former roommate Dawon.

The Rooms and Myself!

I've never noticed people's race. I know a lot of people say that, but I don't believe that race is ever a determining factor in someone's personality. I remember a conversation with members of my college sorority where a sister asked me what my parents would do if I came home with a black boyfriend. I remember thinking, that's a weird question...Why would it matter? As far as I was concerned, race didn't matter, and that's exactly how I was raised by my family. Unfortunately, the generations that have come before me haven't always felt the same way. Racism is still ridiculously prevalent in some areas of our country, something that is so hard for me to grasp.

My sophomore year of college, I lived with my friend Dawon. A funny, athletic softball player, Dawon had fair skin and red hair, just like me. However, she grew up with a much higher exposure to diversity than I did. I sometimes think that Dawon took it as a personal mission to expand my exposure to diversity. She definitely succeeded. It was through Dawon that I met Tyeesha. She is one of the most self-confident women that I have ever met. She's also black. Tyeesha and I routinely joked back and forth regarding aspects of race, both of us poking fun at different situations usually starting with, "It's because I'm white isn't it?" or "It's because I'm black, isn't it?"

Our friendship was recently brought to mind when I was working at Brian's wrestling match. I was helping one of his injured wrestlers, who happens to be female, keep score on the board, as well as helping one of the high school wrestlers keep score in the record books. While we were waiting for the match to start, the opposing team members were walking around being rather noisy. They were what some people would consider your typical country boys, Carhartt jackets and boots, southern accents, and farm-built muscles. A type of guy that I'm very familiar with having grown up in western NC. Something else I'm fairly familiar with is the frequency that these "country boys" like to drive with gun racks on the back of their trucks. The majority of them hunt, and they're damn good at it. So as the three of us are sitting at the score table, myself sitting between the two wrestlers, I made a comment that Susie better keep her "They better be quiet before I have to come over there" comments a bit quieter before one of them hears her.

This is where things get funny. Susie looks over at me and goes, "Dude, we're black. If anyone is going to be shooting, we got this." I'm going to be 100% honest. I never really thought about the fact that Susie and Khalil were black. No joke. So I kinda just look at them, and I said, Uh, I'm sorry. Have you looked at me? I'm as white as you can get. After a beat of silence, Susie and Khalil broke into laughter. No, she said. I meant "WE are black" as she points to herself and Khalil. Ever since then, Khalil has become my new Tyeesha. He likes to make fun of me, and I like to tell him that it's because I'm white.

Let's rewind about a year. During my senior year, I took my senior seminar class with the rest of my Communication major classmates. It was during this class that we took a good, hard look at stereotypes. Although nearly everyone had an opinion on being stereotyped, I was very quick to point out that the majority of people making the comments had most likely never been stereotyped a day in their lives, not for anything major at least. One of the guys in our class echoed my point by explaining that as a black male, he had been stereotyped walking through department stores under the stereotype that he was more likely to shoplift because of his race and gender. Aside from the occasional "ginger" joke, I've never been stereotyped. I've never been followed in a store, had someone lock their doors as I walk past their car on the street, or been subjected to any other similar offensive gesture.

So I'll leave you with this question. What makes race such a prevalent issue in our society? Why does race matter? Isn't it true that when you take someone's blood, no matter their skin color, it looks the same? Aren't our insides the same color? Have you ever been stereotyped?