Eat Clean, Train Dirty

Starting on November 5, Brian and I are taking on a 14 day "Eat Clean, Train Dirty" challenge with each other. I personally have gained about 15 pounds since my graduation from college, and after getting on the scale this morning...oh heck no. I've decided that you can approach your body one of two ways. You either dislike something and then learn to live with it, or you change it. My ballet feet I'm going to have to live with, but how I feel about my body is something that I am changing.

Considering that coffee is one of my biggest weaknesses, I'm trying to cut back before November 5 when we actually start our challenge. For the record, we are starting November 5 because Brian's birthday is this weekend, and we are going to be at the beach with his family, and we didn't want to impose any crazy meal requests on them while we were down there. So starting next Monday, things are going to get a little crazy.

Not only am I going to document our 14 days, I'm going to tell you exactly what we ate (including recipes), what workouts we did, and how we felt. Prepare yourself for some (pardon my language) bitching on my end while enduring what I am sure are going to be excruciating caffeine withdrawal headaches, and Brian's annoyance at the fact that I'm kicking soda out of our fridge for GOOD!

So, as I embark on this little adventure, do you guys have any advice? I'm hoping this will jumpstart our venture into feeling healthier and happier, and any support, love, and advice you guys can give will be greatly appreciated!

How to Prepare for a Disaster

I'll be really honest. The worst weather I have been through was a hurricane and a blizzard. No tornados, no earthquakes. However, I wanted to be a journalist, so I have spent a lot of time reading up about the different preparations one should make when facing a natural disaster. I was also the kid who hated when the power went out. Now that I'm 22, I don't think I would have nearly as much of a problem with being told to sit and read a book by a wood fire...sounds like a perfect day to me! However, not all natural disasters simply cut off our access to power. Many deprive us of food, fuel, clean water, and our daily routines and homes. Please educate yourself and your family members to best prepare for your course of action if faced with a natural disaster.

So, in the midst of Hurricane Sandy colliding with winter weather and causing havoc for places such as New York, New Jersey, West Virginia, and Connecticut, here are a few things that you may not realize you need when facing an extended power outage or evacuation due to a natural disaster.

• Know your surroundings, including potential flooding hazards, elevation of your home/residence, evacuation routes, and how you would arrive at these locations in the event of an emergency. 
• Prepare your home for the worst. If an impending evacuation or natural disaster is even remotely possible, make plans ahead of time to ensure that something is not left out. 
• Have storage for your outdoor furniture in an indoor and safe location, permanent shutters or marine grade plywood (at least 5/8 of an inch thick) to protect your windows and doors, and reinforce any areas within your home you think pose a potential risk. 
• Carefully asses any outdoor shrubbery, trees, and branches that may come loose during high winds, and remove them so that they are not a threat to your home or to others. 
• Clean your rain gutters and make sure they are free of all leaves and debris so that water can adequately flow through them. 
• If you plan on using a generator, have it set up well in advance. Generators are heavy and usually require a large amount of strength to move. Also remember to have extra fuel on hand to keep a generator running. 
• Fill up your gas tank in all of your vehicles ahead of time, and if necessary, bring additional fuel. Hurricanes especially can cause a sharp decline in the amount of fuel available, especially when everyone rushes to fill up their cars at the last minute. Be prepared ahead of time so that you aren't faced with a challenge of being able to evacuate if necessary. 
• Create and test your emergency evacuation plan with your family. This way, if unseen problems do arise, you are able to find solutions beforehand. 
• In case of separation, provide each member of your family with a contact number for an out-of-area relative or family friend, someone who is unlikely to be affected by the same storm that you are. This way, in case of an emergency, you have an outside contact. Also, it is usually easier to contact someone long-distance as their phones are not impaired by the disaster you are facing. 
• Discuss your emergency plan with your neighbors. Strength in numbers is usually good in situations such as these. Also, be sure to ask if any of your neighbors have emergency medical training. This could be come very important knowledge in case you are injured and unable to leave your home. 

The Obvious

• Non-perishable food that doesn't need to be refrigerated and can be cooked on a camp stove or that doesn't require cooking at all. I'm a fan of trail mix, crackers, peanut butter, Luna bars or other granola bars, and dried fruit. Things that require minimal effort to be cooked while still providing lots of nutrients are things such as beans, canned veggies, pasta, etc. Keeping a supply of camping-type foods in your emergency kit is a great way to stay prepared. These items can be found at sporting good stores or specialty hiking stores, while general non-perishable items can be picked up at your local grocery store. 
• Plenty of bottled water! Stock actual bottles for drinking and cooking as well as gallons for things such as brushing your teeth, washing off, and flushing the toilet. You can also include serving-size packets of Crystal Lite and other drink mixes to add to your bottled water if you prefer the taste of something more substantial than water. 
• Medicines, any important medical records or emergency items such as extra medicines, epi-pens in case of allergic reactions, Benadryl, tissues or toilet paper, bandaids, Triple Antibiotic Ointment, baby wipes, and ace bandages. Remember that you are preparing for the worst case scenario and not just a fun camping trip. Natural disasters are no joke, and being over prepared is much better than being under prepared! 
• Foods, medicines, toys, beds, leashes, harnesses, bowls, and drinking water for any pets. My dogs are a major part of my family, and I applaud the directors of shelters in places such as NY and NJ for welcoming families with their pets during this terrible natural disaster. If your pet is more comfortable in a carrier or crate, do your best to bring this as well. Having a comforting place for them that best simulates their normal environment will help prevent additional stress during this already incredible stressful time. 
• Batteries, flashlights, a battery-opperated radio, cell phone chargers, matches, candles, and supplies for cooking. 
• Money, your drivers license, social security card, credit cards, checks, and if available, a copy of your will. I know that seems a little overkill, but having essential documents with you isn't necessarily a bad thing. You never know what you are going to encounter if you are forced to evacuate. 

The Less Obvious

• Clothing that can be worn in layers and that is acceptable for the current weather conditions. Just because you think that you are going to be holed up in a shelter doesn't mean that's always the case. Be prepared to be relocated if need-be, meaning weather appropriate shoes, clothing, and outerwear. 
• Emergency blankets. These can be picked up at your local sporting goods store. I am also a big fan of super absorbent towels. Made of very thin material, these are specifically designed to store in a small location and absorb high amounts of water, very useful when preparing for a flood or hurricane. 
• Any feminine products you may need. Ladies, just because you're not expecting your period during this time doesn't mean that you will be back in your home before you get it, or that a high-stress environment will not make your monthly gift come early. Like I said, better to be over-prepared than under-prepared. 
• Family photos, special mementos, or similar items that you could not replace. Remember that if evacuating your home, that there is always the possibility that you will not return to a house in the same condition in which you left it. I know this is something that no one really wants to think about, but better safe than sorry. For me, this would be my external hard drive for my computer will a back up of all of my photos, the flags that were presented to me when my grandfathers passed away, a copy of my giant family tree, and any first edition books that I treasure, such as A Time to Kill by John Grisham. Don't judge. 
• Entertainment. Okay, I know this isn't really essential, but for families with younger children or in my case, a person who simply can't sit still, I would definitely bring books or a Kindle. Having entertainment to pass the time makes people a lot easier to deal with because it gives their mind something to occupy itself with aside from the impending stress of the situation. 
• If you plan on staying at home, make sure that your home is the most secure it can be. Are things liable to fall on you if your house experiences a strong gust of wind? Do you know where your water and gas shut off is in case a line breaks? 
• DO NOT STORE BLEACH AND AMONIA IN THE SAME AREA. These chemicals create a toxic and deadly gas when combined, and an accidental mixing could be lethal to you and your family. 
• 
  

Remember: A natural disaster can strike anytime and anywhere. Although some we are warned of in advance, others appear very quickly leaving us very little time to prepare. Consider all of these tips when preparing for any type of natural disaster. 

STAY SAFE!

Bears, Beets, Battlestar Gallactica

So this weekend was an absolute blast! Not only did I get to hang out with Brian, Kassie, and some awesome little gingers that I babysat, but I also got to learn a lot of life lessons about growing up. Brian and I finished priming the half-bath in our bedroom this weekend, which is such an exciting project. Okay, so we almost finished. I exaggerated. We still have do to a second coat of primer under the sink, but then we're done!

We've deeded that we are going to put tile down in the bathroom and paint the walls a light blue. The additional plans are to finish putting hardwood down throughout the house, including the bedrooms and the hallway. We are going to try and tile not only our bathroom, but the main bathroom and the kitchen as well. This is the transition between the wood and tile that we are thinking about. Let me know what you think!

Of course, we found it on Pinterest! Something else that we are thinking about doing is adding ceiling tiles in our bathroom. Not really a different color, but just a nice white tin. This is the one we're thinking right now, so if you have a different idea, or want to comment let me know! I've also included a colored one, so please give me your opinion!

So I'm sure that you can guess (or already know) that I'm obsessed with Pinterest. So this weekend, I decided to try a few different recipes and DIY projects, and I'll tell you which ones worked and which ones didn't!

1. Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins

Recipe

Verdict: Holy lord. For how easy these muffins were to make, they are going to become a very popular desert in our house! They're very dense, and very flavorful, and so, so, easy. Brian called them, "so freaking good."

2. Flour-Free Banana Gluten Muffins

Recipe

Verdict: These muffins were incredible! I'm not supposed to eat a lot of wheat, but my body does fine with a majority of the oats that I consume, which is why I am in love with this recipe. With only seven ingredients, not only do I know exactly what is in them, they're also very filling and very delicious! Brian gives them a thumbs up, which is always a good thing. I added walnuts on the top just to give them a bit more of a crunch. Another great thing is that, as you can see, I made them in a blender, so I had barely any clean up! 

3. Cleaning Cookie Sheets

Instructions

Verdict: Well, unfortunately for my old cookie sheets, it didn't work for me! I'm thinking I didn't add enough of one of the components (baking soda or peroxide), or that my cookie sheets just don't like me.  Oh well. If you guys get it to work for you, please let me know so I can find out what I did wrong!

4. Going to sleep

So this morning, Brian and I woke up to Charlie barking at 6 a.m. He got up to let Charlie out, and all of a sudden, I hear him calling my name in a bit of a panic. So I wake up, walk out into the living room, and Brian tells me that somehow, Chase was out in the front yard when he let Charlie out. At first, we were concerned that someone had tried to break in and Chase had gotten out. We checked the front door, Checked the back door, made sure the PS3 and everything was still in place, and then when we finally realized the problem...I had left the window behind the couch open overnight. Chase, the little sneaker that he is, apparently jumped out the window, through the screen, and into the front yard. Looks like I can add "replace screen" to my list of things to do this week...

How to define YOU

What defines me? 

Style? Makeup? Personality? Shoe size? Weight? Sexual orientation?

No. None of that. I refuse to be defined. I refuse to be smushed and molded by society into their definition of "pretty." I refuse to become someone I'm not so that I can "fit in" to this stereotype that women have created for themselves or that men have created for women. I say no. It stops here, now, with me.

My weight does not define me. My sexual orientation doesn't define me. Not my favorite color, favorite food, or my political party. I chose how I am defined. I choose who I am. No one else can tell me who to be, what to do, what to think. Stop living up to someone else's standards, or dropping to them for that matter. BE YOURSELF. Respect yourself because YOU say so. Love your body because it continues to protect, serve, embrace, and carry you every day.

Find someone who loves you for exactly who you are. Someone who loves you when you can't decide what you want for dinner, when you're crying and your mascara is running down your face, when you're laughing so hard no sound comes out, when catch you stealing the pickle off their plate while eating lunch, when you decide that it's is a no-shower kind of day, when you drag them on errands, and when you tell them that your dog ate their PS3 controller. Find someone who tells you that you're beautiful when you feel fat, or who lets you choose to watch ghost stories on Netflix even though it freaks them out. Find someone who wants to teach you how to play their favorite game, someone who will eat at Olive Garden with you for the unlimited soup, salad and breadsticks every time you want to go out to lunch somewhere, and someone who tells you that they will share their orange gummy bears with you even though they are their favorite.

Be exactly who you want to be. Be the person who screams with absolute happiness every time you drive past a groundhog, or cries when they run over the suicidal squirrel who jumped out in front of the car. The person who can watch the same movie over and over again simply because it never stops making them happy. Be a person you can admire. Someone you can look back and be proud of. Someone who never has to ask "what if" because they already know. Wear white after labor day, sandals in November, and long sleeves at the beach. Cry when you see the Sarah McLachlan commercial about abused pets.

Vote for who you want. Don't feel like you have to answer questions you don't want to. Don't be afraid to admit when you fail because you learned from it. Stop hating the little details that make you who you are. If you don't like something, then change it, or learn to live with it.

Stick to your morals. If you say you're going to do something, do it. Keep your promises. Be faithful. Be just. Be honest. Be respectful. Stand behind your opinions when you're right, and admit when you're wrong.

Don't give a damn about what anyone else thinks about you.

Live your life for yourself.

Define yourself.

Be you.

How to Battle Celiacs Disease

"Today is world pasta day!" 

That is what my morning announcement opened with at work today. Two years ago, I would have been all over World Pasta Day. Pasta and I had a very loving relationship. There were so many types to enjoy, and I was borderline-obsessed with each one.

Cue summer of 2010. Mom had sent me to a chiropractor and dietician to make sure that I was keeping my hypoglycemia under control after losing my 'Freshman 15' and it was during my sessions with the dietician that I learned that I had a mild form of Celiac's disease. For those of you who aren't aware, Celiacs is a wheat and gluten intolerance that disturbs the lining of the intestines, preventing them from absorbing the necessary vitamins and minerals from the foot that we eat. People who have a family member with Celiacs are more likely to develop an intolerance, which can occur at any point during your life. Turns out, Mom was diagnosed a year before me, but her intolerance is much, much worse than mine.

At first, I didn't see how I could have Celiacs. I had none of the same effects as my mom. She had a few bites of bread and was sick for 24 hours. I ate pasta all the time! I was fine. I was healthy. I was a college sophomore dealing with a lot o stress of my constant involvement. Any problems I was having I just attributed to stress. Unfortunately, after some close examination, it turned out that wasn't the case.

After doing a bit of research into the more uncommon symptoms of Celiacs, everything that I had been attributing to stress could be explained by Celiacs. Nausea, bruising easily, nosebleeds, anxiety and depression, fatigue, and others were all symptoms of Celiacs due to the lack of absorption of  key nutrients.

Fast forward to today.

Yes, I still eat pasta, sandwiches, pancakes, and all of my favorite foods. I don't drink beer, I make my own salad dressing, and I try to limit wheat/gluten intake to once a day.

Here are the 5 best tips I've learned from battling Celiacs:

1. ALWAYS do your research before consuming something. I treat my celiacs almost like a nut allergy. Gluten and wheat can be found in things that you would never expect (salad dressing, OTC cold medicine, soy sauce, tortilla chips, and cold cut sandwich meat to name a few), so I always make sure that I know not only what is in what I'm eating, but also the different names that companies use for wheat and gluten. I also have learned to never trust a box that says "gluten free" or to assume that something is gluten free because it's not obvious.

2. Get tested specifically for celiacs. Many people are diagnosed with IBS instead of Celiacs because IBS is a much more common diagnoses. Fortunately, doctors are now equipped with specific methods of testing for Celiacs, and the process is usually a simple blood test. Unfortunately in some cases, more invasive testing may be required, such as a biopsy of your intestines to see how much damage has been caused. If you are getting tested or if you think you may have Celiacs, do not attempt to treat yourself before being tested. Beginning a gluten-free diet before being tested can cause inaccurate results. However, even if your blood test comes back negative, there is always a way that your doctor can test you for a lower intolerance such as what I have. Spend 14 days eating absolutely no wheat or gluten. No cheating! On day 15, go out and buy yourself beer and pizza (assuming you're 21!) and stuff yourself. Beer and pizza are very high in wheat and gluten, so if you get very sick, chances are you have an intolerance.

3. Resist temptation. I know that I am always going to be temped to eat wheat and gluten, mainly because I love it so much. One of the best things that you can do for yourself is to limit temptation by limiting your exposure. For me, this means buying wine or cider instead of beer, planning my meals instead of eating on the go where I am more likely to grab something that will make me sick, shopping for healthier foods and refusing to buy something I know is going to make me sick. If you are constantly looking at a box of cookies in your pantry, chances are sooner or later you're going to eat them. So what's the solution? Don't buy them!

4. Find a buddy. For me, I have tried my best to get my boyfriend on board with me in terms of eating less wheat and gluten. Sometimes, we do just have pizza for dinner. Giving in to the occasional craving is okay as long as you accept the consequences. My mom is the same way. The other day when we went out to eat, she wanted mac & cheese, so she got it. Having my mom be able to tell me what I can and can't eat is really helpful, and the fact that I do most of the shopping instead of Brian is also a big plus!

5. Make social media your best friend. Now-a-days, Pinterest can basically tell you how to do just about anything. Try and create a board that is strictly gluten/wheat-free recipes and use that for the majority of your big meals. Another way that I like to get involved with being gluten-free is with the support groups in the area. Going gluten-free is a big trend right now because of how many health benefits people can get from it even if you aren't allergic. This pairs well with finding a buddy, but just make sure that you are really dedicated to making the healthier choices. Speaking from a pasta-lover, it's really not as hard as you think!

So now it's your turn! Do you have any tips? Favorite gluten-free recipes? SHARE THEM WITH ME! Or if you are newly diagnosed, find me on Twitter or send me a message or comment on here and I'd love to talk to you!

Channeling Peter Pan

I Bought A Lawnmower was originally created to tell you about my life as I transitioned from a college student to an "adult" (whatever that means!). So here we go. I DON'T WANT TO GROW UP!!!!

5 Things You Don't Realize the Cost Of

1. Vacuum cleaners. 
So last night I was babysitting (because I had to get a second job to help pay off student loans) and I saw a commercial for a vacuum cleaner. Brian and I, well, more just me, have been looking at getting a vacuum cleaner to use since the dogs track leaves and sticks into the house all the time. His mom left us a great handheld dust buster with an extended handle, but I think the dogs are a bit too big for the current vacuum. So when I got up this morning, I couldn't for the life of me remember what type of vacuum I saw on the commercial! I knew that it was more of a streamlined version and that it transitioned from a longer handled vacuum to a hand held, etc. So I decided to start Googling, like always. After some research, I was dismayed to learn that the vacuum that I had seen on TV was a Dyson DC44 Animal Cordless Vacuum...for $399. Seriously? $400 for a vacuum? No thank you, unless it happens to do the laundry, cook dinner, and massage my feet as well. So I am currently in the market for a vacuum cleaner in case you guys have any suggestions.

2. Car Insurance
Holy car insurance. I got lucky that my parents have helped me pay my car insurance since I got my license. I've kept a (fairly) clean record, and I don't have a super expensive car, so I figured that I was probably in the lower range in terms of car insurance. Nope. Dad told me that I was now responsible for paying my car insurance starting in April when it expires. Turns out my car insurance is $90 a month. Holy lord. So aside from comparing the prices of vacuums, I am now comparing the prices of car insurance. Awesome. Again, any suggestions would be highly appreciated.

3. Groceries
Believe it or not, I miss eating in college. Meal plans were awesome! You didn't have to worry about cooking or cleaning up, you just got to go in, swipe your card, and eat. Not so much in the real world. I've always been a decent cook, but it's totally different when you have to work an 8 or 9 hour day and then come home and make dinner...which reminds me that I didn't think of anything to set out for dinner tonight...oops. This weekend Brian and I are sitting down and organizing exactly what we want for dinner next month so that we can stick to a budget. The worst thing is that I love fresh foods like fruits and veggies, cheeses, eggs, and things like that. Well, they're expensive. It turns out that eating healthy is super expensive. Which sucks and is totally unfair. So any advice on extreme couponing is also appreciated.

4. Living in General
For those of you who got apartments while in college, you seriously already have a leg up on me. I lived in a dorm all four years of college, and so my supply of household things was rather low. It wasn't until I moved in with Brian that I truly realized how expensive it is to live, and how much stuff you need that you don't realize. Spices, toilet paper and paper towels, dishwashing detergent, laundry detergent, trash bags, cleaning supplies, air fresheners, light bulbs, and batteries...and that's the short list. Don't forget about pots and pans, baking dishes, tupperware, a hair brush, toothbrush, toothpaste, and everything else that you need. Dear mom, a care package would be really nice right about now!

5. My Starbucks Addiction
Okay so I've said before that I'm a little bit of an addict when it comes to coffee....well, luckily for me, my job has free, freshly ground and brewed, Starbucks coffee each morning. Unfortunately, I have yet to invest in a coffee pot other than the lovely french press that Kassie gave me. I also haven't purchased coffee, so the french press isn't being used yet. Lately, I have been waking up on the weekends and running errands, which usually includes a stop at Starbucks. Brian totally supports my habit (mostly because I pay for it), but I think it has gotten a bit out of hand. I did some math, and realized how much money I spend on coffee each year, and I was a bit shocked.

Right now I only drink Starbucks on weekends on when I'm driving long distances, which equals out to probably twice a week. Not nearly as much as I would be drinking it if it wasn't supplied at work. So if I spend $4 on coffee twice a week for a year, I would spend over $416 on coffee. I could buy the Dyson vacuum cleaner if I gave up my weekend coffee splurge, groceries for two months for me and Brian, rent for a month and a week, 13 years of Netflix, 10 tanks of gas, 8 Victorias Secret bras, or...I could have almost enough money to buy THESE SHOES!

Maybe next year I'll forgo Starbucks in favor or these shoes...

How To Appreciate Politics

Well, last night was the last presidential debate between Mitt Romney and Barack Obama that was hosted by Lynn University in Boca Raton, Florida (shout out to my hometown!). I spent most of the night curled up watching the debate and my computer simultaneously, because it's almost more amusing to watch my Twitter and Facebook feed than it is to watch the actual debate. However, despite the outspoken nature against both candidates on social media sites, it serves as a constant reminder about how truly lucky we are as Americans.

Some of you are probably saying, "No! So-and-so is a complete idiot! How can voting for him or listening to him make us lucky?" For those of you who raise that question, I remind you that in many other countries throughout our world, making outspoken remarks on social media about the leader of our country could land you in prison. Not in America, though.

(I hope Billy & Kyle, if they read this, thoroughly enjoy this next part.)

For those of you who enjoy a good cinematic experience, I highly recommend checking out a movie called The American President starring Michael Douglas, Annette Benning, Martin Sheen, and Michael J. Fox among others. One of my favorite lines throughout the entire movie is this:


A. J. MacInerney: The President doesn't answer to you, Lewis!
Lewis Rothschild: Oh, yes he does A.J. I'm a citizen, this is my President. And in this country it is not only permissible to question our leaders it's our responsibility!

This moment in the movie summarizes our rights as citizens of the United States of America to ask questions, to have doubts, and to question the judgement of our leaders. As Lewis says, it is not only permissible to question our leaders it's our responsibility. I agree wholeheartedly. One of the rights that we have as Americans is to question the decisions of our elected officials. It was Americans who put them into their positions, and it's Americans who choose to keep them there or not. Like it or not, come November 6 Americans will make a choice. We will never have a time where 100% of Americans agree on the vision of our leader, but like it or not, they don't just represent the percentage of people who elected them. They represent the United States of America. Every man, woman, and child has one president, whether he received their vote or not.

So instead of being "sick of politics" or "ready for the election to be over" be proud of the fact that we are able to live in a society where we have the ability to cast our vote and let our voices be heard. Respect what people have to say because it is their right, just as it is yours to speak up and disagree with them.

I leave you with this:

"America isn't easy. America is advanced citizenship. You gotta want it bad, 'cause it's gonna put up a fight. It's gonna say, You want free speech? Let's see you acknowledge a man whose words make your blood boil, who's standing center stage and advocating at the top of his lungs that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the top of yours. You want to claim this land as the land of the free? Then the symbol of your country can't just be a flag; the symbol also has to be one of its citizens exercising his right to burn that flag in protest. Show me that, defend that, celebrate that in your classrooms. Then, you can stand up and sing about the "land of the free". - President Andrew Shepherd, The American President

"Homophobia" - Not Quite...

Okay, so hopefully the title got your attention that this is a blog post that I feel very strongly about. I have been trying to read more blogs lately, and this morning I stumbled across one that was truly touching.

Life in a Bed and Breakfast is written by a guy living in Vancouver, BC who, with his partner, operates  the Nelson House Bed & Breakfast. The first blog post that I came across on this beautifully-written blog was called "The Opposite of People-Friendly" and was posted on October 8, 2012. Please take a few moments to check it out before reading the rest of my blog posting.

Life in a Bed and Breakfast

Okay, here we go. So after reading this posting, I remembered a conversation that I had while visiting my old college campus the other day. I took a (very) early lunch break to stop by and see Rick Santorum speak, simply to see how people at my small liberal arts school reacted to him. Now, for those of you who don't know, Lenoir-Rhyne has an incredible Gay-Straight Alliance, and has spent a long time cultivating an environment of love and acceptance, what they have dubbed a "Safe Zone." Rick Santorum, who is openly against gay rights, is seen as someone who pretty much goes against any sort of "Safe Zone" that L-R has worked to establish. However, I respect the fact that L-R is open to allowing both sides to be heard on campus, something that University President Dr. Wayne Powell stated while opening the morning. This time, it just happened to be a side of social issues that I don't particularly agree with.

Rick Santorum speaks at Lenoir-Rhyne in favor of early voting and the support of Presidential candidate Mitt Romney. 

Although many people supported Mr. Santorum's speech (which was advocating for having a voice during the election as well as proclaiming support for Presidential candidate Mitt Romney and never mentioned his belief on gay rights), many members of the Gay-Straight Alliance waved flags and held signs proclaiming their disagreement with Mr. Santorum's views. While I was standing on the outskirts of the crowd of students, I overheard one girl say that the gay flag being waved was making her "uncomfortable." I respectfully turned to her, and asked her very simply, "Why?" She then explained that she was from a southern Baptist family, and that she was brought up believing against gay rights and considered herself sort of homophobic. I thought about this for a moment, and then kindly said to her, "Just because you're uncomfortable doesn't make you homophobic...It just means that you were raised believing in something different, and what you're seeing is unknown to you. As long as you are open to the beliefs of others and don't condemn or judge them because of their sexual orientation makes you alright in my book." She then told me that she had a good friend who was gay, and that she didn't see her any different. Her statements told me what I had initially believed: she wasn't homophobic, she just wasn't sure of how to react.

In my opinion, a phobia is a crippling fear. Arachnophobia, the fear of spiders, is a fear so intense that the person almost shuts down. It's a debilitating fear that makes the person unable to perform the most mundane and general tasks. Which brings me back to what people call "homophobia." This girl wasn't homophobic...she was just uninformed. She wasn't raised with a love and tolerance of people who were gay, but she didn't stand around condemning them either. She was simply uncomfortable with the unknown.

Just because you do not share the same beliefs as someone doesn't mean that you have any right to judge them. I have to commend my boyfriend for this, because he is a great example of what I am talking about. He was raised Catholic, and his mom worked at their local parish for more than a decade.  The Catholic Church wholeheartedly believes in the sanctity of marriage between a man and a woman, and are pushing for a constitutional amendment protecting what they believe is the only acceptable marriage. My boyfriend joined a fraternity in college, and I am proud to say that many of their members are openly gay. Many of them also happen to be very, very close friends of mine. Instead of looking down on the gay members of his fraternity, Brian sees them as simply what they are: his brothers. They all joke around about it, but at the end of the day, their sexuality is not what defines them in Brian's mind; their brotherhood does.

This brings me back to Life in a Bed and Breakfast. The way these people acted is an absolute disgrace. The owners of this B & B opened their homes and their hearts in welcome, and instead of being grateful, their welcome was not only turned down, but run over by an 18-wheeler. However, their reaction is inspiring. The post ends with the phrase, "Don't be a hater at all. Life is way too short to have death-bed regrets." Instead of hating on the people (which I know I sure as heck would have!), he instead advocated tolerance and love. Now THAT, my friends, is an inspirational blog posting.

So please remember, someone is not defined by their sexuality but by their personality. Yes, their sexual orientation is a part of them, but it isn't who they are any more than my sexual orientation is who I am. I am an artist, a music-lover, a volunteer, a hard worker, a writer, and a crazy mess. I'm 1/2 of a great, loving, accepting relationship. And yes. I'm straight. But who cares?

Instead of seeing someone's sexual orientation, instead see their accomplishments and their personality. Just because someone is different from you doesn't mean that you should judge them. Instead, learn from them. Preach acceptance and love, not ignorance and hate. If you have judged people in the past, wake up tomorrow and know that it is a brand new day.

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.” Paulo Coelho 

On The Road Again - Life Lessons

So this weekend I decided to spend some much-needed relaxation time back "home" in Cashiers. Chase took the trip with me, and we not only learned quite a bit about ourselves, but about life in general. Check out our weekend adventures below!

Chase was a great passenger on the way home! He sat up front, kept me awake, and amused people driving next to us with his funny faces.

 Lesson #1: Dogs make great travel companions. 

This is Chase on Grandma's new couch...

Lesson #2: When your grandma buys new furniture, your dog will test it out and make sure that it meets his high standards. 

Verdict: The couch passed. 

My Uncle Kap just bought a lake house in Glenville. It's absolutely gorgeous, and we took advantage of the fall weather on Saturday and ventured out to see it. Here is Chase on a dock for the first time! Lesson #3: If your dog doesn't know what a lake is, chances are he will try to jump in it. 

Here is Cooper and Kap's legs. Kap is looking at the water, and Cooper is looking at me. What a goober. 

The view from Kap's new dock. It was absolutely gorgeous. 

Saturday night, a few friends from high school got together for a bonfire and cookout at Michael's house. It was so much fun, and Michael graduated from CIA (the Culinary Institute of America) so the ribs were incredible, and so was the vodka-soaked watermelon! 

Lesson #4: If the fire isn't burning fast enough for you, use a leaf blower to speed things up. 

As you can see, the ride back wasn't quite as exciting for chase as the ride there. He took advantage of not being a human and having to drive and curled up behind my papasan cushion to take a nap. 

Lesson #5: Dogs really aren't great driving companions, especially when they snore. 

Thank goodness for Starbucks. 

Top 10 Things I Would Do If....

If there was an extra hour in a day, what would you do with the extra time? An hour might not seem like much, but one hour each day for a year is 365 hours. That's quite a bit of time in the grand scheme of things, people.

I know a lot of people are going to automatically think, "SLEEP!" Especially most of my college friends. I probably would think about sleeping for an extra hour a day, but I can sleep when I'm dead.

Top 10 Things I Would Do If...There Was 25 Hours in a Day

1. Learn French

2. Spend more time with my family and friends

3. Learn how to be good at running

4. Take time to enjoy eating my meals, instead of rushing through them

5. Read more

6. Spend more time volunteering

7. Get my masters degree

8. Get a second job so that I could pay off my student loans faster (no joke...)

9. Brew my own coffee at home

10. Learn how to play the guitar

My goal is to pick one of these things every month and try and dedicate some of my free time to it. Stop wishing and start making my goals a reality. Which one should I pick for November?

What would YOU do with an extra hour each day?

How To Watch Football with A Guy

So I'm at home this weekend for a much-needed family weekend. Unfortunately, Tucker and Chase came to blows last night and then again this morning, and I almost abandoned my family weekend to retreat back to the safety of my new home. I think I would have left if Dad hadn't convinced me to stay and watch the University of Florida vs. South Carolina Gamecocks showdown. Which brings me to the topic of today's post. How to watch football with a guy.

I'll let you in on a few secrets about my dad. First of all, he is a UF alum. Second of all, he prefers television shows "that have a scoreboard." When I was a kid, the power went out one night and dad and I passed the time by asking each other Trivial Pursuit questions. In the sports category, he missed 2 out of 500. Yeah. That's my dad. He likes sports.

So here is my advice for watching football (or sports in general) with a guy.

1. Be prepared for loud outbursts. If you are someone who is easily startled (like me), prepare yourself for frequent and very loud spurts of yelling. These can come whether the play is positive or negative, so just because your team is ahead doesn't mean that they are going to stop yelling.

2. Bring snacks. Guys are generally big on game-day munchies. Dad likes chips and dip, popcorn, or veggies and ranch. If you don't like yelling, providing snacks gives the guy something to shove in his mouth instead of yelling. It's an upside.

3. Do a little bit of research if you're clueless in terms of sports. I didn't attend a live football game until freshman year of college but I did spend quite a bit of time watching sports with dad growing up. We were regular Braves game attendees, and I've attended some mean hockey games in Atlanta as well. If you plan on watching a football game with a guy, brush up on facts. Here are a few things you need to know: (Thanks to Football for Dummies at www.dummies.com for the easy to understand tips!)

Down: A period of action that starts when the ball is put into play and ends when the ball is ruled dead (meaning the play is completed). The offense gets four downs to advance the ball 10 yards. If it fails to do so, it must surrender the ball to the opponent, usually by punting on the fourth down.

Drive: The series of plays when the offense has the football, until it punts or scores and the other team gets possession of the ball.


End zone: A 10-yard-long area at each end of the field. You score a touchdown when you enter the end zone in control of the football. If you're tackled in your own end zone while in possession of the football, the other team gets a safety.

Extra point: A kick, worth one point, that's typically attempted after every touchdown (it's also known as the point after touchdown, or PAT). The ball is placed on either the 2-yard line (in the NFL) or the 3-yard line (in college and high school) and is generally kicked from inside the 10-yard line after being snapped to the holder. It must sail between the uprights and above the crossbar of the goalpost to be considered good.


Field goal: A kick, worth three points, that can be attempted from anywhere on the field but is usually attempted within 40 yards of the goalpost. Like an extra point, a kick must sail above the crossbar and between the uprights of the goalpost to be ruled good.

Fumble: The act of losing possession of the ball while running with it or being tackled. Members of the offense and defense can recover a fumble. If the defense recovers the fumble, the fumble is called a turnover.


Incompletion: A forward pass that falls to the ground because no receiver could catch it, or a pass that a receiver dropped or caught out of bounds.

Interception: A pass that's caught by a defensive player, ending the offense's possession of the ball.

Kickoff: A free kick (meaning the receiving team can't make an attempt to block it) that puts the ball into play. A kickoff is used at the start of the first and third quarters and after every touchdown and successful field goal.

Touchdown: A score, worth six points, that occurs when a player in possession of the ball crosses the plane of the opponent's goal line, when a player catches the ball while in the opponent's end zone, or when a defensive player recovers a loose ball in the opponent's end zone.

False start: When an interior lineman on the offensive team moves prior to the snap of the ball, or when any offensive player makes a quick, abrupt movement prior to the snap of the ball. This is a 5-yard penalty.


Holding (defensive): When a defensive player tackles or holds an offensive player other than the ball carrier. The penalty is 5 yards and an automatic first down.

Holding (offensive): When an offensive player uses his hands, arms, or other parts of his body to prevent a defensive player from tackling the ball carrier. The penalty is 10 yards.

Offside: When any part of a player’s body is beyond the line of scrimmage or free kick line when the ball is put into play. Offside is a 5-yard penalty.

Pass interference: A judgment call made by an official who sees a defensive player make contact with the intended receiver before the ball arrives, thus restricting his opportunity to catch the forward pass. In the NFL, this penalty awards the offensive team the ball at the spot of the foul with an automatic first down. In college, pass interference is a 15-yard penalty and an automatic first down.

Personal foul: An illegal, flagrant foul considered risky to the health of another player. A personal foul is a 15-yard penalty.

Roughing the kicker: When a defensive player makes any contact with the punter, provided the defensive player hasn’t touched the kicked ball before contact. This is a 15-yard penalty and an automatic first down.

Roughing the passer: When a defensive player makes direct contact with the quarterback after the quarterback has released the ball. This is a 15-yard penalty and an automatic first down.

4. Before the game starts, ask him to explain anything you're confused about. If it is during the game, do not ask, especially during the play. If it is a commercial, ask, but don't interrupt the game. They will just ignore you, and you'll still be confused. Or, if all else fails, listen to the key words the announcers are using and Google it with your smart phone. Discreet and informational.


5. If your guy has a favorite team, a good Christmas or birthday present might be tickets to a game being played by his favorite team.

How To Treat a Cat Bite

Well I learned a very good lesson this morning. Chase can open almost-closed doors with his nose. This would have been much better to know before I was standing outside the front door with it wedged but not quite shut all the way petting Brian's cat Bloodbath. She (yes, Bloodbath is a girl...don't ask) kept nudging me to pet her, so I picked her up and began to scratch her ears and under her chin. About this time, I hear a noise behind me. As I turn around, I realize that Chase has gotten the door open. Unfortunately, before I can react, Bloodbath starts freaking out, biting my wrist and fingers. Instead of being smart and just dropping the cat, I calmly walked to the doggy gate that separates the bedrooms from the rest of the house and dropped Bloodbath safely behind it.

Cue the freak out. I looked down and basically went into a bit of shock. My wrist had 6 punctures, my first finger had 4. There was a scratch running up the back of my hand, and all of these were bleeding simultaneously. Happy Friday.

So instead of trying to treat my hand, I walked out to my car, got in, and left for work. After realizing that my hand was in searing pain was when the tears started. Not going to lie, blood freaks me out. So I called Brian (hope that voicemail doesn't freak you out too badly!) and then my roommate. No answer. So I walk into work, clock in, and wait for my boss to arrive. When she walks in, I calmly said, "Um, Tina? Please don't freak out but do we have a first aid kit?"

So, lesson for the day.

How to treat a cat bite! 

Step 1: Make sure you are in a safe area, where the cat is not going to continue biting/scratching you. Remove yourself from the situation as quickly as possible.

Step 2: Thoroughly wash the affected area/s with antibacterial soap and warm water. If the scratches or punctures begin to heal before you wash it, any infection may become trapped under your skin, causing even more medical problems.

Here is my arm with the puncture wounds. The ones on my wrist/arm are from biting, as well as the larger one on the left. The one above that is a scratch. I also had puncture marks on my fingers, but taking a picture of the other side of your finger is hard. 

Step 3: After washing very well, apply Neosporin or another topical antibacterial ointment to the areas. Use a q-tip for this as to not touch the areas with your hands and possibly contaminate them further.

The best nurse ever! She's getting ready to apply antiseptic to my han 

Step 4: Cover the wounds with bandaids and/or gauze, depending on the size, location, and severity. If possible, use gloved hands to apply gauze and bandaids to the area as to further reduce the chance of infection.

This is my arm wrapped in gauze. There is a bandaid on my pointer finger to protect the bites there as well. 

Here is my arm after being covered in a wrap. It's similar to athletic pre-wrap if you're familiar with that. 

Step 5: Apply an ice pack to the area to reduce swelling and pain. To further reduce pain and inflammation, an over-the-counter pain reliever such as Tylenol may be taken every 4-6 or as directed on the package. 

Here is my arm with an ice pack wrapped around it. Ready to properly start my Friday now! 

I hope you guys can learn from my mistakes! Happy Friday!

Decoding Women

"Why can't you just say what you mean?" "What are you talking about?" "So are you mad, or not?" "Do all women just speak in some sort of woman-code?"

I'm pretty sure that we are just not meant to understand the opposite sex. It's part of a joke that the high power plays on us just to watch us be confused. I've read some of the best "decoding the opposite sex" blog posts and magazine articles lately that I figured why not try it myself!

Top 10 Ways to Better Understand Women:

1. "I'm fine/Nothing is wrong."
Chances are, that is the biggest lie ever. It usually means, "Hey, you are screwing up, and you don't get it, so I'm just going to keep my mouth shut about how I feel because you won't understand anyway." The best way to solve this problem is to calmly (CALMLY!) say something like, "Babe, I know you're probably not okay, and you can tell me if you want and I will do my best to understand." A little effort goes a long way.

2. "Fine." 
Same as above. What you are about to do/just did is most likely not fine. She is most likely thinking, "Wow. Are you really dumb enough to think that is okay?" If you are asking for something, take a few moments to re-think your question. Most of the time, I use this phrase when Brian asks me something really stupid (love you, babe). For instance, "I know you wanted to have a quiet night tonight with just us because you've had an awful week of work, but I invited someone over. Is that okay?" Sometimes guys think that girls don't make sense, but in our minds, guys are the confusing ones! Just try and see things from a girl's point of view. A lot of times, it's a misunderstanding because the girl thinks she is being 110% clear, but to the guy, she mind as well be speaking a foreign language for all the sense it makes. Try simplifying what you're trying to say and explaining the whys of your reasoning. All it takes is one over-reaction for things to go haywire in situations like this, which just equals a FIGHT. Fights are BAD. If you are already having an argument and "fine" is used, just end it. Say sorry, be the bigger person, and say sorry and walk away. Nothing good comes from "fine."

3. "Whatever/It's no big deal."
The majority of these are very similar. "Whatever." doesn't really mean "whatever." It is not whatever. It is probably what we told you in the first place. Chances are, we thought we made our opinion very clear, and guys just don't seem to get it. Did you bring home a supreme pizza for dinner and your girlfriend is a vegetarian? Handed her a beer when she's allergic to wheat? She wants you to remember the small things, and even though it may not truly be a 'big deal' that doesn't mean that you should forget about it! However, there is an upside. Sometimes, "whatever" really just means "whatever." Like last night, Brian wanted to know what I wanted for dinner. I said whatever. I really meant whatever. I wanted to cook something at home, which is what I said, but aside from that, I said we could pick whatever we felt like when we got home...and I meant it.

BODY LANGUAGE (Here's a small tip. Our facial expression and body language says a lot. Arms crossed and lips in a tight line when we're saying something? Not good. That usually means that we mean the opposite of what we're saying. Reference above.)

4. Listen to the details
I know that to guys, details aren't really important. It's not about the fact that during a meeting, a coworker giving a presentation said "um" 67 times, it's about the fact that something annoyed us and we want to share that with you because it was a part of our day. Instead of giving a generic response such as, "Oh." or "I'm sorry." actually listen and respond. Say something like, "That must have been super annoying." or "Some people just need a good public speaking class now-a-days, don't they?" Even if you think the conversation is pointless, taking the time to actually listen and respond is a big thing to women. We want to feel like you care, not that you can't wait until we stop talking so you can play another round of Halo.

5. Don't always be a problem solver
This goes back to listening to the details. When women share a story about something that they are having trouble with, it's not always that we want you to come up with a solution. A lot of the time, we just want a kind ear to listen to what we have to say. Sometimes, talking it through with someone out loud is better clarification for us. For example, if I come home complaining about being asked to do a meaningless task at work, instead of telling me that I should talk to my boss if I don't like what I'm doing, ask follow up questions. "Does that happen often?" or "What, if anything, do you think you're going to do about it?" are good responses in that situation.

6. Show & Tell
Communication is important in every relationship, but it takes more than one form of communication to have a quality relationship. You can't just tell someone how you feel, you must show them through actions as well. If you tell a girl you're sorry, do something to show that there is meaning behind your words. Go pick her some flowers, or take the initiative to pick up/make dinner one night.

7. It's the little things
Now, this one may just be me, but I'm not all about the expensive things. It's just never been me. I don't need a guy who buys me diamond earrings, buys me elaborate flower arrangements every other week, or takes me out to a super-fancy restaurant every month. That's just excessive in my opinion. However, this goes back to showing a girl how you feel about her. Instead of buying her an expensive flower arrangement, pick her a bouquet from a local park (if there are rules against this, either don't do it, or don't get caught...just saying). Knowing that she has had a rough day at work and picking up her favorite take-out dish so she doesn't have to cook that night is one of the best things ever (at least for me)!

8. "We need to talk"
Guys run and hide from this phrase, but it's not always a bad thing! Not going to lie, sometimes I'm about to tell you that our dog ate your PS3 controller...but not always! Usually this just means, "Hey. I want to tell you something important and I want you to hear me out." Show that you actually care about the relationship by not avoiding conversations like this. Girls out there - try using a different phrase! For real though, "we need to talk" and "hey can I talk to you for a minute" basically mean the same thing, but guys tend to freak out way less about the second one.

9. "A few minutes"
This one is a bit tricky. There are two different ways that this can go, and each are important. Situation one. If a girl is getting ready and you ask, "How much more time do you need?" and she says "A few minutes." That usually means like 20...at least. In this situation, "a few minutes" is my way of saying, "The more you ask me, the longer it will take, so just be quiet." Situation two. When you tell a girl you are going to keep playing Halo until dinner, and she says, "Just a few minutes." Trust me. That actually means, "Your butt better be done in under 5 minutes."

10. "Never mind, I'll do it."
She is lying. She'll do it all right, but you're gonna mind. Trust me. When your girl asks you to do the dishes and after 10 minutes you still haven't gotten off the couch? That could very well illicit a, "Never mind, I'll do it." This is a trap. And whatever you do, don't ask, "What's wrong?" Because all that will do is get you a "Nothing is wrong" or a "Whatever" and I think we already know what THAT means.

"DON'T EAT THE POOP!"

I really need to Google how to train your dog, especially after yesterday. So if you've been reading my blog, you know that Chase decided that it would really show his love to Brian if he snacked on his $54 PS3 controller. Wrong-o. Bad idea.

Well apparently, that was just a warm up. I did some Googling, and was instructed that my dog may need more physical and mental exercise. Okay, easy enough. After 15 minutes of trying to teach Chase how to "lie down" (he knows "sit" but hasn't mastered "come"..."lie down" didn't go much better), we decided to take a short walk down the road and back. As we're walking out of our yard, I stopped to check the mail. Chase's leash was wrapped around my arm casually since he doesn't really pull, so when he started sniffing around the ground I wasn't really concerned.

Then I turned around. My dog was eating poop. Not even his own poop. Someone else's dog's poop. Awesome. He licks me with that tongue. Or at least, he used to until I saw his desire to eat excrement. No more kisses. Thanks, but no thanks.

So of course, my first reaction was absolute shock. Then it quickly transitioned to horror, causing me to start jumping up and down, pulling on his leash, and yelling, "DON'T EAT THE POOP! POOP IS NOT FOR EATING! PUT THAT DOWN! CHASE! NO! STOP EATING POOP!" I turn around and realize that Brian is absolutely horrified. I mean, so was I, right? No. Brian was horrified because about two seconds before what I will now refer to as the "Great Devour of 2012," our neighbors walked out of their house. Just in time to see me jump up and down and yell about poop. Awesome. Thanks for the heads-up Brian.

I think I shocked them a little bit, because they quickly got into their cars and drove away.

So if anyone has an suggestions of dog training websites, or canine mouthwash, I'd really appreciate it.

#dogshaming

Best Advice I've Ever Gotten

What's the best advice you've ever gotten? For me, it wasn't really one piece of advice, but the courage and self-confidence that my parents instilled in me growing up.

I was the smart-ass child. I had an opinion on just about everything, and I loved talking to anyone who would listen. I grew up with parents who told me that I could be anything that I wanted, and to never sell myself short. I was given the opportunity to travel abroad with my parents at a very young, and the cultures that I was exposed to made me a very well-rounded individual. My parents also raised me to believe that everyone is equal and should be treated the same no matter what. I think that this is one of main reasons I developed the personality that I did. I see people as exactly that, people. No one is better than anyone else, and should instead be judged on their personality and hard work rather than coming into the world with a sense of entitlement.

My junior year of college, I had a huge falling out with a professor. During one of our disagreements, the comment was made to me that I would never make it in the real world with my attitude. I think that "shock" doesn't begin to describe my reaction. My attitude? You mean the one that tells me all people are created equal? That hard work and determination are what get you through life, not material things? It's quite amusing to look back on the months that followed that conversation. I had just returned from a national college media conference that our department had attended because of my determination and hard work (and no, I'm not making it all about me...I literally found out about the event a month before, helped set up fundraisers, booked the hotel, found us transportation, and organized all of the events we would attend). My attitude is one of determination. When I want something to work, I do everything I can to see it through. I give 150% to the things that I am passionate about, and my hard work pays off. So what happened with this professor?

Funny how things turned out, actually. That was fall of 2010. My grades put me on the Dean's List 3 out of my final 4 semesters. I brought my GPA up more than .1 and graduated with honors. While other students were out celebrating being in their final year of college, I was in the library or at one of my two jobs busting my butt on homework and saving money to repay my loans. I graduated college and was immediately offered a job. Although it ended up not working out, I found my second job, where I am now, two months later. I am currently working 40 hours a week in my intended area of study, getting paid way above minimum wage, and learning more than my professor ever taught me.

I guess it just goes to show that sometimes, people will try and bring you down. Self-confidence is something that young adults, especially women, are lacking in our society today. Don't be one of the statistics. Rise above the norm and find your passion. With hard work, determination, and faith, you truly can be whatever you want to be. The only person who dictates your future is you.

So what is the best piece of advice you've ever gotten? What is your best piece of advice that you can give to others? COMMENT!

Oh, the other best piece of advice? "Always be nice to the warden." Thanks, Dad. Thanks a whole heap.

‘MERICA!

I am personally incredibly proud to be an American. I think that we all need to take a few seconds each day and remember that we live in a country where having an opinion is not only legal, it’s encouraged. We have the right to vote, the right to think freely, the right to practice whatever religion we wish, the right to own weapons to protect ourselves, the right to study whatever we wish to study, and so many other things. I think a lot of people take it for granted.

As a woman, I’m not required to register for the draft, something that I am really thankful for. I’m one of those people who don’t know how to shoot a gun, can’t run more than a mile, and sure as hell can’t do a pull-up. I’m not properly equipped to fight for our country.

You may be wondering what brought all this up. Well, I was putting something into Brian’s wallet the other day and he had his selective service registration card. It really made me think about how many people I know who have voluntarily stepped up to serve our country, and the level of dedication, selflessness, and pride that they must feel in order to stand above the rest of us and lay down their lives in such a way.

I’ve known many people who have served in the military. My godmother’s son Carson (Marines), his father Jeff (Marines), my grandpa Ken (Marines/Navy), my grandpa Lee (Army), Brian’s brother Shawn (Navy), and many members of my high school. It is because of these people that there is not a draft in our country. The dedication and courage of others has allowed our country to move away from drafting soldiers. The people who are abroad and at home fighting for our country are doing so because they have a greater calling for freedom. They do more than sing the Star Spangled Banner on the fourth of July, set of fireworks, and say the Pledge of Allegiance. For them, being an American is their life.

So why are there so many people who aren’t thankful for the service that our military is doing? The horrors that our service men and women have seen have left them scarred, emotionally and physically. They return home and require years, even decades, of therapy to deal with the scars left by battle. Instead of supporting them, we too-often do not get them enough of the help that they need in order to adjust to civilian life once their service is complete. In my opinion, people see the need to cut the military budget because they don’t think that we need to be fighting as many wars as we have been.

I say keep the military budget, and I’ll tell you why.  Instead of putting the majority of the funding into weapons and fighting, allocate more of the funding to troops who are returning home and in need of readjustment. These men and women have spent time away from their families, spent time in the hospital, and spent years training to defend our country. When they return home, adjusting to civilian life must be a nightmare! Imagine being told what time to go to sleep, what time to wake up, when and what you eat, when you work out, and so many other things, and then all of a sudden, it stops. You no longer have a schedule. You have been in a war zone for months and seen things that very few of us can even dream of. These soldiers, these heroes, need our support. They need therapy without having to worry about having to pay for it. They need help adjusting to civilian life, finding a job, living what we see as a “normal” life.

Too often, our heroes return home and do not receive enough therapy in order to fully re-adjust to civilian life. I’ve been in therapy. It’s super expensive. These men and women have served our country, and now we need to serve them at home.

I know many people don’t agree with the wars we have fought, especially abroad in Iraq and now in Afghanistan. I respect the opinions of others in terms of fighting abroad, but I also must ask them to show respect for our soldiers either way. Just because you don’t support the war doesn’t mean you shouldn’t support our men and women giving up their lives for what they believe in.

So, the next time you feel the need to criticize the war, remember that every person who loses their life is someone’s son, daughter, brother, sister, mother, father, aunt, uncle, or cousin who has given up their life for the safety of others. They fight for the freedoms that we so often take advantage of. Also remember that we are not simply fighting wars oversees, but at home as well. For every police officer, firefighter, EMT, member of the National Guard, and many more, remember that they risk their lives to keep us safe.

“This nation will remain the land of the free only so long as it is the home of the brave.” – Elmer Davis

Going to the chapel...or the courthouse?

We've all heard the song. "Going to the chapel and we're gonna get married." But is it really true?

In this day and age, more people are opting for smaller, more intimate weddings. I myself know quite a few people who have forgone the church entirely in favor of a Justice of the Peace union. With the requirement of a marriage license/certificate (at least where I'm from), people are essentially seen as "married" by the state before they step foot before a priest or pastor or other religious figure.

Let's rewind a minute. I'll be the first to say that I'm a Christian, but I'm also a very big advocate for the separation of church and state. But when it comes down to it, there is a lot more than to the separation of church and state than meets the eye.

For example, the separation of church and state says that there will be no prayer in public schools, yet students are still expected to place their right hand over their heart and recite the Pledge of Allegiance? "One nation, under God." That right there violated religion in public schools. Going one step further, the money that we keep in our wallets still says, "In God we trust" on it.

For advocates of a separation between church and state, this is an incredibly difficult thing to tactfully divide. According to the 2012 Pew Study, 73% of Americans classified themselves as religious, meaning that more than 7 out of 10 people believe in some sort of religion. That's quite a few. I'll be the first one to admit that I mainly classify the separation of church and state as effecting the government's acceptance and recognition of same-sex unions. I often forget that with a true separation of church and state, I lose many of the things that I associate with simply every day life. The Pledge of Allegiance and the $5 bill in my wallet don't even begin to register when I debate with someone about recognition for same-sex couples.

But the fact is, you can't have your cake and eat it too. People who believe as Christians that we should have "Under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance as well as equality for same-sex couples must realize that it's one or the other. If we choose to remove religion from our government, we lose a part of our nation's founding as well. So where does the balance lie?

According to an article on www.gaylife.about.com, it is very hard to estimate exactly how many LGBT individuals are currently living in America today. The problem is presented in a variety of different ways including people who are not yet "out" and the different definitions that people have for what constitutes someone as LGBT. Experts estimate that the numbers are between 1 in 10 and 1 in 20. Let's just say 1 in 15 for the sake of this argument. But does that really matter? Many people see those statistics and think, it's obvious isn't it? Seven out of 10 and 1 out of 15...how are we still arguing over this? Well, in my mind, the reason is obvious. For Christians who advocate for the use of the word God in our government, taking away that word doesn't change the fact that they're religious, it simply changes the way our government adapts to the changing times of our world. But playing devil's advocate, deciding against same-sex unions doesn't change how two people feel about one another. So again I ask you, where is the balance?

In a "can't have your cake and eat it too" scenario, I chose the underdogs. I chose the rights of same-sex couples over saying God in the Pledge of Allegiance or on our currency. Why? Maybe you noticed that I haven't said same-sex marriage. I don't think that same-sex marriage should be ruled legal. Now wait a minute, you're asking yourselves how that makes sense given everything my blog has discussed so far. Don't worry, I'll explain. I think that if the government is going to separate church and state, then no one should have to get a "marriage license" or a marriage-anything. I think that the government should revert to judging unions between two people exactly the same: as a union. If people want to sanctify that union in front of a religious official and their God, that is their business. Make everything a union instead of a marriage. Take the word marriage out of the equation.

I realize that I have just done more to drive a wedge between people who read my blog and who now probably consider me a complete lunatic in terms of my Christianity. That's okay, because I believe in God and I believe what is said in Mark 12:30-31 (American King James version) And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength: this is the first commandment. And the second is like, namely this, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is none other commandment greater than these." I do love the lord my God, and I do love my neighbor as myself. It's just that my neighbor happens to be gay. Big freaking deal. I'm a Christian and I believe in the separation of church and state and the right of people in same-sex relationships to solidify their love together just like I hope to do with someone in my future. Simply because I was born as a woman who loves a man doesn't make me any better, or give me any greater rights than someone who was born as a man and who loves a man, or born as a woman who loves a woman.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

The greatest of these is love. Love is something that each of us is capable of giving to another person, and it is such an incredible power. The Bible says love. Just love. Not love between people of opposite sexes, not people who are Catholic, or Episcopalian, or Buddhist. Just love. 

So my bottom line is this. Forget the percentages. Forget the one in ten, seven in ten, one in a billion, it doesn't matter. What matters is the love of two people and the relationship that they choose to have. If you are lucky enough to have found solace in the love of another, hold onto it for dear life. Cherish it. Nurture it. True love is rare and precious. Don't let the opinions of small-minded people influence what the bible says is the "greatest." Love.